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Writer's pictureMario Bolivar

Beyond The Perfect Meal

By now, many of you know I’m not a fan of the traditional Thursday turkey meal. I just don’t care for turkey—no matter how much adobo, seasoning, or effort goes into it. I know, I know, that’s an unpopular opinion, but I prefer steak, rice and beans! But just because I’m not into turkey doesn’t mean I don’t love Thanksgiving. I LOVE THANKSGIVING, just not the regular menu. Know that I cherish everything else about it—the connection, the relationships, and, most importantly, the time spent together.


For many, Thanksgiving means visions of a perfectly roasted turkey, tables stacked high with side dishes, and peaceful family harmony. So, it’s easy to get caught up in the idea of making everything flawless—the centerpiece, the meal, and even the family dynamics or conversations. And yet, what happens when things don’t go as planned? Have you ever heard of Murphy’s Law? What if the holiday meant to celebrate gratitude and togetherness turns into chaos? Are you ready for that? I pray you have some frozen pizza in the garage, just in case. I'm trying to be funny and real with you. lol


This season, I want to remind you of something important: Thanksgiving—and family itself—aren’t about perfection. They’re about connection, understanding, and the courage to stand up for each other—even when it’s uncomfortable. Especially when it’s uncomfortable.

In many of our minds, the holiday gathering is more than just a meal. It’s a time to reinforce traditions, celebrate the year’s blessings, and show gratitude for those we love. HOWEVER all too often, the pressure to create the "perfect" celebration gets the best of us. We worry about meeting expectations or upholding traditions, and we forget the deeper purpose of the day. When we focus too much on controlling what we can, we can miss the meaningful connections that really make the holiday special.


This Thanksgiving, let’s not pretend that everything is perfect. Let’s make room for the messiness, the interruptions, and the chaos. Let’s pay attention to the voices that are often dismissed or overlooked, especially the young ones or older ones, or anyone who might speak up about struggles, pain, or even politics. So, if the conversation starts to get heated, listen. What might seem like a chaotic discussion could be a powerful reminder of how important it is to hear each other, to listen to our children, and to respect those quiet voices that often carry the loudest truths.


And if you’re considering skipping out on family gatherings this year for whatever reason, I recommend that you prepare not to be alone. Talk to that one person you trust, and make sure you’re not alone. You are loved, and connection matters.


If things get tense or don’t go as planned on Thursday, I pray you’ll have the courage to bring people together, share kindness, and protect one another. Let go of anger and blame, and remember what this holiday is truly about. Thanksgiving is not ruined because things don’t go smoothly; you cannot break Thanksgiving if you remember why Thanksgiving really matters.


May you remember that we are resurrection people—people who believe in second, thirs and more chances, new beginnings, and comebacks. Let any moments of tension be reshaped into moments of clarity, understanding, grace, and laughter. Take the opportunity to invite someone for a walk, bring someone into the circle, or offer up your special seat at the table. Let this Thanksgiving be about standing up for each other, setting healthy boundaries, and embracing uncomfortable truths that can bring us closer.


In that moment, what may have seemed like an imperfect, chaotic dinner could become a pivotal moment of growth for your family. Thanksgiving doesn’t need to go according to plan to be meaningful. What truly matters is that we embrace the messiness of family life, honor each other’s stories, and support one another through the unexpected.


So, this season, let’s remember that family isn’t about flawless gatherings or idealized traditions. It’s about vulnerability, courage, and the ability to listen and stand up for each other. This Thanksgiving, let’s be reminded that the most important moments often come not from the perfect meal or the flawless conversation, but from the moments of truth and connection we least expect.




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